When I became a Pepper on May 9th this year, I thought it might be fun to start to write a little chronicle on married life, something to look back on when we’re old and grey and the sofa is bearing the imprints of our rapidly expanding behinds. When I sat down to try and put the idea into actual words….I realised that being married is really no different to living together, except that occasionally I get referred to as “Wifey”. I’m hoping the novelty will soon wear off. Our day to day lives have not changed, our relationship has not really changed in any discernible way and Monty the cat and Milo the dog still show us as little respect as they ever did.
And then one day, a couple of weeks ago, I saw purple…..twice!
Eeek!! And yay, obviously…. I think my exact words were “OHMYFUCKINGGODWE’REHAVINGABABYMILO!!!!!”. Milo is the dog. He looked unimpressed.
Clearly though, you can’t trust just one purple line. Luckily there are two in a pack.
But then I thought…hold on, these are crappy Sainsburys own pregnancy tests. I can’t trust these….I must spend more money!!
I think at this point a sane and rational human being might think that these results were pretty conclusive. But in case you hadn’t noticed, the words “sane and rational” have never been used to describe a pregnant woman, so after a few more days of not vomiting, not fainting and not doing any of those things that pregnant soap characters do, off I popped back up to Asda to get me another pee stick.
Holy SHIT y’all – I’m pregnant !!!!!!!
And now I have something to talk about – you lucky, lucky beans you!!