Conversations with my daughter

Evie is three years and 3 months old.  I might have mentioned that I am finding three to be a….PITA challenge.

People often refer to the “Terrible Twos”, but that’s a major misnomer.  The thing about two is, they’re still babies.  Still cute, still inarticulate, and still someone malleable.

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2 year old Evie. See? Too cute to be maddening!

Three, on the other hand, has an opinion, has attitude, and has vocabulary (some more than others, admittedly).

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What, mother?

So, I thought I’d take this opportunity to share some of the more, erm, precious recent exchanges between my little 3-year-old monster and me.

While driving down the freeway:

E: Mommeeeeee, I’m hungry.  I want a banana!

Me:  Evie, I can’t reach you back there right now, you’ll have to wait.

E:  No Mommy.  You stop the car.  You stop the car right now, then you get out, and you come to me.  Stop the car, mommy!

Me: EVIE!!  You are so bossy!

E: Noooooo, I’m not bossy, I’m Evie Pepper!

Today, at lunchtime:

E:  Mommy, I’m hungry.

Me: OK, Evie, what would you like for lunch?  Would you like scrambled eggs?

E:  No, I want bumble bee eggs.

Me:  Bumble bee eggs?  What are those?

E: Bumble bee eggs.  Bees make honey, mommy.  Flowers make honey.  I want bumble bee eggs.

Me:  ?!?!?!?!?!?

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Incredibly, this passed inspection!

Whilst driving home one day…

Me: Evie, is the baby asleep?

E:  No Mommy, he’s not a baby, he’s a big boy.  You say “is the big boy asleep”!!
Me:  Oh, sorry Evie, is the big boy asleep?
E:  No, Mommy.

Me:  Is he awake?

E:  No, Mommy.
Me:  (thinking “OMG, what then, is he DEAD?!”) Well, Evie, what is he?

E:  He’s a BIG BOY, Mommy!!!

Sigh…..

And then, of course, my favourite:

Me:  Evie?  Evie!?!?  Evie, where are you?

E:  Mommy, why you calling me?

Me: Because I wanted to know where you are!
E: But why, mommy?

Me: Because, I need to know you’re safe?

E: But, but, but, but why you saying that, mommy?

Me: Because you ran away before, Evie.  I need to make sure you’re close to me.

E: Why, mommy?

Me: Because I say so, Evie?

E: But, why you say so, Mommy?

And so on, ad infinitum….

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Because I SAID SO, okay?!?

And finally, while we were all outside playing, and I glanced up to see Evie running around in the nudie:

Me:  EVIE!!!  Why are you naked?  Where are your pants?

E: I did wee wee, mommy!

Me: Where did you go wee, Evie?

E: (very proudly) I did wee wee in the garden, like Milo!

Me: Argh!!  Evie, don’t DO that, you have to wee in the toilet, OK?

E:  OK, Mommy.  <pause>.  I did poo poo, too!
Me: WHAT?  Evie!!!  Where did you do a poo?  Show me!

E: Right here, Mommy.  Here, look!

Me: Where? I can’t see it?

E:  RIGHT HERE, Mommy.  See? Milo ate it!

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Arrrrghhhh!!!! Seriously!?!?

Four is a breeze, I hear.  Only 9 and a half months to go….  they call it Fabulous Four, right?

RIGHT!?

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One Response to Conversations with my daughter

  1. Becci says:

    Hate to be the bearer of bad news but we still have that attitude at 5 😦

    Like

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